1、 I performed my chores; I completed my projects; I ran my errands. In truth, I spend the day as I spend every other day quietly polishing the routine of my life until it gleamed with perfection.That is why its so astonishing when I decided to go to my hallway closet and retrieve a revolver that had
2、never been used.My body was discovered by my neighbor, Mrs. Marsha Huber, who had been startled by a strange popping sound. Her curiosity aroused, Mrs. Huber tried to think of a reason for dropping on unannounced.After some initial hesitation, she decided to return the blender she had burrowed from
3、me 6 months before.Marsha Huber: Oh! Its my neighbor. I think she has been shot! Theres blood everywhere. Yes, youve got to send an ambulance. Youve got to send one right now! And for a moment, Mrs. Huber stood motionless in her kitchen, grief-stricken by the senseless tragedy, but, only for a momen
4、t. If there is one thing Mrs. Huber was known for, it was her ability to look on the bright side. I was laid to rest on Monday. After the funeral, all residents of Wisteria Lane came to pay their respect. And as people do in this situation, they brought food. Lynette Scavo brought fried chicken. Lyn
5、ette had a great family recipe for fried chicken. Of course, she didnt cook much when she was moving up the corporate ladders. She didnt have the time. But when her doctor announced Lynette was pregnant, her husband, Tom, had an idea. “Why not quit your job? Kids do better with stay home mom. So it
6、would be so much less stressful.But, this was not the case. In fact, Lynettes life had become so hectic. She was now forced to get her fried chicken from a fast food restaurant. Lynette would have appreciated the irony if she started to think about it. But, she couldnt. She didnt have the time. Lyne
7、tte: Stop it!Kids: Mom! Youre going to behave today. I will not going to be humiliated in front of the entire neighborhood. And, just so you know how serious I am?One of the twins: Whats that? Santas cell phone number. The other of the twins: How do you get that? I know someone who knows someone who
8、 knows an elf. And if any of you acts up, so help me, I will call Santa and I will tell him you want socks for Christmas! Are you willing to risk that?Kids shake their heads no. Ok. Lets get this over with. Gabrielle Solis, who lives down the block, brought spicy paella. Since her modeling days in N
9、ew York, Gabrielle had developed her taste for rich food and rich men.Carlos, who worked in mergers and acquisitions, proposed on their third date. Gabrielle was touched when tears welled up his eyes. But she soon discovered this happened every time Carlos closed a big deal. Gabrielle liked paella p
10、iping hot. However, her relationship with her husband was considerably cooler. Carlos: If you talk to Al Mason about a thing, I want you casually mention how much I paid for your necklace.Gabrielle: Why dont I just paint the receipt on my chest? He let me know how much he had paid for his wifes new
11、convertible. Look, just work into the conversation. I just cant find a way to work it in, Carlos. Why not? At the Donahue Party, everyone was talking about the mutual funds, and you found a way to mention you slept with half of the Yankee outfielders. I am telling you, it came up in the context of t
12、he conversations. Hey! People are starting to stare. Can you keep your voice down, please? Absolutely. Wouldnt want people to think we are not happy. Bree Van De Camp, who lives next door, brought baskets of muffins she baked from scratch. Bree was known for her cooking, and for making for her cloth
13、es, and for doing her own gardening and for re-upholstering her own furniture. Yes, Brees many talents were known throughout the neighborhood and everyone on Wisteria Lane thought of Bree as a perfect wife and mother. Everyone that is, except, her own family.Bree: Paul, Zachary.Zachary: Hello, Mrs.
14、Van De Camp.Paul: Bree, you shouldnt be gone through so much troubles. It was no trouble at all. Now the basket with red ribbon spilled with deserts for your guests but the one with blue ribbon is just for you and Zachary. Its gonna be rolls, muffins breakfast type things. Thank you. At least I can make sure your boy would not miss a meal for tomorrow. I know youre out of your mind with your grief. Yes, we are. Of course, I will need the baskets back once you done.
