1、friends 808808 - The One With The Stripper_Written by: Andrew Reich and Ted CohenTranscribed by: Jean Liew_Scene: Central Perk. Theyre all there except for Ross. Rachel walks up to Phoebe.Rachel: Hey Pheebs.Phoebe: Huh?Rachel: Im having dinner with my dad tomorrow night, do you want to come?Phoebe:
2、Sure, ok, hes kinda sexy! Rachel: Oh no, no, Im going to be there too.Phoebe: Ok, so we can come up with some kind of signal. If its going well, you can just take off.Rachel: Yeah, Pheebs, I just need you there for support. I havent told him that Im pregnant yet.Phoebe: Why not?Rachel: Cause I know
3、hes going to freak out and I hate it when he gets angry.Phoebe: Oh Rachel! This is all so “Papa dont preach.”Rachel: Pheebs, hes a scary guy! I mean, one time he caught me smoking and he said if I ever do it again, hes going to make me eat the whole pack.Phoebe: Wow! Well, I will be there!Rachel: Th
4、anks.Phoebe: Gosh, Im not going to let that man make you eat your baby! (They sit down) Op, hey, who is that guy? (they look at a guy kissing some woman) I think I know him.Monica: No you dont!Rachel: No you dont.Phoebe: Oh my God! Monica, hes the stripper from your bachelorette party!Chandler: Her
5、what?!Phoebe: Your secret bachelorette party.Chandler: You had a bachelorette party?Phoebe: She untied his g-string with her teeth. Somebody stop me! Chandler: I thought we werent going to have bachelor / bachelorette parties. We agreed that it was a silly tradition. Joey: A grand tradition!Monica:
6、Im sorry! They surprised me! There was nothing I could do!Rachel: Well, you couldve untied it with your hands.Joey: This is so unfair. The one thing I wanted to do was throw my friend a bachelor party, but, oh, I wasnt allowed to. All we got was a stupid steak dinner.Chandler: You went home with the
7、 waitress.(Joey reminisces.)Joey: Uh, yeah, that was a pretty good night.Chandler: I cant believe you didnt tell me. You know that the two pillars of marriage are happiness and honesty!Monica: Uh! I know giving you that book would come back and bite me in the ass!Opening CreditsScene: A restaurant.
8、Phoebe, Rachel and Dr. Green are looking at menus.Dr. Green: How about I order everyone the Moroccan chicken?Phoebe: Oh, I, I dont eat meat.Dr. Green: Its chicken!Phoebe: Yeah, I dont eat that either.Dr. Green: I dont understand you Lesbians. (Rachel mouths something to Phoebe) So, baby, what is new
9、 with you?Rachel: Actually, um -(A waiter comes with the wine.)Waiter: Your 74 Lafitte, sir.Dr. Green: 74?! I ordered a 75. Thats a magnificent wine. The 74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage?! Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why youre a waiter?Waiter: This is why I told the
10、 manager I wouldnt wait on you tonight!(He goes off.)Dr. Green: Oh, dont be such a baby! (He follows him.)Rachel: In case you didnt notice, that is a scary man.Phoebe: And hes right though. The 74 is absolute piss!Rachel: This was such a huge mistake. I cant tell him, Phoebe. I cant, I cant.Phoebe:
11、Rachel!Rachel: No, its ok. this is what Im going to do. Im going to wait a couple of years and then the baby will tell him.Phoebe: What? So he can get mad at the baby?Rachel: That is the babys problem. (Dr. Green returns) Ah, everything ok with the waiter?Dr. Green: I have no idea. I went to the bar
12、. So, sweetie, you were starting to tell me. What is, what is new with you?Rachel: Well, uhhh, Im - I got TiVo!Dr. Green: Whats TiVo?Phoebe: Its slang for “pregnant.”Rachel: Phoebe!Dr. Green: Are you really pregnant?Rachel: Uh, yes and no. Except, not no. So to sum it up, yeah!Dr. Green: Whos the fa
13、ther? Ah, no, please dont tell me its her. Rachel: No, its Ross. Its Ross. You like Ross! (He shakes his head) Daddy, I hope youre ok with it. I mean, this is a good thing. This is your first grandchild! Youre gonna be a Poppy!Dr. Green: Thats true.Rachel: YeahDr. Green: Im going to be a Poppy! Oh,
14、Im going to be a Poppy!Rachel: Oh yeah!(Theyre both laughing.)Dr. Green: Oh.oh.So, when is the wedding?Rachel: Uh, hmm, who?Dr. Green: The wedding. Theres going to be a wedding. Young lady, dont you sit there and tell me that my first grandchild is going to be a bastard. Rachel Karen Green, tell me
15、theres going to be a wedding!Rachel: February 2nd! Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Joey, Ross and Mona are there.Mona: So, if was really cool seeing you lecture today.Ross: Oh, thanks. Although, uh, it kinda seemed you were falling asleep there.Mona: Oh, no, no. I had my eyes closed so I could, yknow
16、, concentrate and take it all in.Ross: Yeah, a lot of my students do that.Mona: Umm.So, um, I gotta get going.Ross: Ill see you tonight?Mona: Yeah.Ross: Bye.(They kiss.)Mona: Oh, thanks again for showing me your semi-precious stone collection. It was amazing!(She leaves.)Chandler: My God, you must b
17、e good in bed!Joey: So, you and Mona. Its been awhile now, hows it going?Ross: Uh, its good. Its, its going good. I mean, we get alone great. She, shes so -Joey: Hot?Ross: I was going to say sweet, but yuh-huh!Chandler: And shes ok with Rachel and the baby?Ross: Well, I havent actually told her yet.
18、 I dont want to scare her.Chandler: Well, you gotta be honest with her, otherwise you may think youre going down the same path, but youre actually going down different ones.Joey: Im gonna take that book and Im gonna beat you to death with it.(Monica enters.)Monica: Oh my God, youre gonna love me so
19、much! I felt so bad about the bachelorette thing, so tonight, youre gonna have a bachelor party!Chandler: What?Monica: Yeah, I got this number from a guy at work and I hired a stripper to come dance for you. Am I going into the wife hall of fame or what?!Chandler: Honey, thats crazy! I dont need you
20、 to get me a stripper!Joey: Will you let the lady talk?!Monica: Come on, come on! Itll be fun! Itll make me feel so much better.Chandler: I appreciate it, but its sorta creepy, yknow? Im not a bachelor anymore.Monica: So dont think of it as a bachelor party. Think of it as a two month anniversary pr
21、esent.Ross: One year is paper but two months is a lap dance!(Joey nods.)Monica: Please, I feel so bad! Just watch the hot woman get naked!Chandler: Fine, fine, but Im only doing this for you.Joey: Yeah!Chandler: And Joey.Monica: Thank you. All right, who else do you want to invite?Chandler: Just Ros
22、s, Ross and Joey are embarrassing enough. Ross: Uh, sorry, I cant make it. Im seeing Mona again tonight.Chandler: I understand. Who would cancel an actual date just to go to a bachelor party?(Joeys on the phone with a girlfriend.)Joey: Im sorry, I gotta cancel tonight, baby.(He gives them a thumb up
23、.)Scene: The restaurant. Phoebe and Rachel are at the table alone.Phoebe: Im sorry. I cant make it to your imaginary wedding, but, uh, Im really busy that day. I, I, I already have a unicorn Baptism and a leprechaun Bar Mitzvah.Rachel: All right, all right. I, I, I panicked, I panicked. I just didnt
24、 want him to start yelling at me like I was some 74 Latour.Phoebe: Lafitte. The 74 Latour is actually drinking quite nicely.(Dr. Green is coming back.)Rachel: All right, here he comes. Im going to do this. Im going to be strong.Dr. Green: I just called a friend of mine.Rachel: Yeah.Dr. Green: I thin
25、k I may be able to book the Plaza on short notice.Rachel: Really?! The Plaza?! Oh Daddy! (hugs him) Right. Daddy. I need to talk to you. Please sit down.Dr. Green: What is it, sweetie?Rachel: Theres not going to be a wedding. Ross and I arent getting married.Dr. Green: What?Rachel: Im sorry, Daddy.
26、Dr. Green: I dont believe this!Rachel: All right, stay calm, Daddy, please.Dr. Green: How?! How do you expect me to stay calm?! This is unacceptable, Rachel! And I wanna know why! Is it because that punk Ross wont marry you? Am I right?!Rachel: Yes, yes, he says Im damaged goods.(Phoebes mouth drops
27、 open.)Scene: Chandler and Monicas, Chandlers bachelor party. Hes wearing a gold crown and Joeys wearing a gold top hat. Theyre waiting for the stripper.Joey: So, uh, you nervous about getting married?Chandler: What are you doing?Joey: Look, lets pretend its a real bachelor party, ok? Like, before y
28、our wedding. Itll be more fun.Chandler: I cant believe tomorrows the big day.Joey: Hows it feel knowing youre never going to be with another woman again? Knowing youre going to wake up to the same face every day, until youre finally going to have the sweet release of death?Chandler: Youre right, thi
29、s is more fun.(Theres knocking on the door.)Joey: Its her. Ok, come on!(They open the door.)Stripper: Hi.Chandler: Hi.(Joey blows his noisemaker.)Stripper: So, which one of you lucky boys is Chandler?Joey: Oh, that, that, thats me!Chandler: Thats me.Joey: Joey Tribbiani. (shakes hands) Big fan.Strip
30、per: So thats the bedroom?Chandler: Yeah, yeah, right over there.Stripper: Whenever youre ready.(She goes in.)Chandler: That was weird.Joey: Why, why would she go in the bedroom?Stripper: Im waiting!(They go in and immediately come out.)Chandler: So shes a -Joey: Yep, thats one naked hooker!Scene: R
31、osss place. Hes having wine with Mona.Mona: I love your place! (Picks up a statuette) Wheres this guy from?Ross: Uh, thats an 18th century Indian artifact from Calcutta.Mona: Oh, so, youre more than just dinosaurs.Ross: So much more.(They kiss and Mona kicks over the Indian thing.)Mona: Oh, oh my God. Im so sorry!Ross: Its all right. Its f
