生活大爆炸英文剧本第二季1112Word格式.docx
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生活大爆炸英文剧本第二季1112Word格式.docx
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OritturnedintomustardKryptonite,theonlywaytodestroyarogueKryptonianhotdogthreateningEarth.
LEONARD
Raj,please,let'
sstayserioushere.Superman'
sbodyisKryptonian,thereforehissweatisKryptonian.
Yeah,whataboutKryptonianpitstains?
Supermandoesn'
tsweatonEarth.
Okay.He'
sinvitedfordinnerintheBottleCityofKandor.Heminiaturizeshimself,entersthecitywhereheloseshissuper-powers.Now,beforedinner,hishostsays,„Who'
supforalittleKryptoniantetherball?
“Supermansays,„Sure,“worksupasweat,comesbacktoEarth,hisuniformnowstainedwithindestructibleKryptonianperspiration.
Booyah.
SupermanwouldhavetakenhisuniformtoaKandoriandry-cleanerbeforehelefttheBottle.
Kandoriandry-cl...?
Igiveup.Youcan'
thavearationalargumentwiththisman.
Hey,isn'
tthattheguywhowontheMacArthurgeniusgrantlastyear?
No,notallatonce.
Thenhow?
Leonard.NowRaj.NowSheldon.
Ididn'
tgetagoodlook.CanIgoagain?
No.
It'
sDavidUnderhill.Sowhat?
Sowhat?
Hisobservationofhigh-energypositronshasprovidedthefirstconclusiveevidencefortheexistenceofgalacticdarkmatter.
Ihavetwowordsforyou.Thefirstis„big,“theother'
s„whoop.“
Itisabigwhoop.Madealmostalltheworkyou'
vedonesinceyou'
vebeenherecompletelyuseless.
Didnot.
Didtoo.
Did...Okay,maybesomeofit.But...Look,theguywasjustintherightplace,attherighttimewiththerightparadigm-shiftingreinterpretationoftheuniverse.Hegotlucky.
Inmorewaysthanone.He'
saveryhandsomeman.
Doesn'
tdoanythingforme.IfIwasgonnagothatway,I'
mmoreofaZacEfronkindaguy.
Oh,yeah.LikeyouhaveashotwithZacEfron.
DAVID
Excuseme.AreyouLeonardHofstadter?
Uh,yeah.
I'
mDavidUnderhill.
Uh,yeah.Heh,heh.
Yeah,Dr.GablehausersaidifIwantedtosetsomethingupinthephotomultiplierlab,thatyou'
dbeabletogivemeahand?
Youwannaworkwithme?
Ifyouhavealittletime,yeah.
Wow.Yeah,sure.Yeah,noproblem.Um,here'
smyhomenumber,here'
smycell,here'
smyoffice,here'
smyparents'
numberupinNewJersey.Theyalwaysknowhowtoreachme.
Okay.
CongratulationsontheMacArthurgrant,bytheway.Bigfan.
Thanks.I'
llcallyou.
Okay.Bye-bye.Whatareyoulookingat?
You'
veneverseenahypocritebefore?
=================================
===========THEMESONG==========
Trailingbadly,WolowitzneedsastrikeifhehasanyhopesofcatchingupwithSheldonCooper,whoisdominatingintheninthframewithacareer-best68.
Hey,guys.
Thatdoesn'
tcount.Do-over,do-over.
Therearenodo-oversinWiibowling.
Therearealwaysdo-overswhenmypeopleplaysports.
Wherewereyouthat'
smoreimportantthanWiibowlingnight?
Actually,Iwas...
sarhetoricalquestion.ThereisnothingmoreimportantthanWiibowlingnight.
Comeon,it'
sjustavideogameandwesuckatit.
Nicemotivationalspeechfromtheteamcaptain.
Wherewereyou?
IwasworkingwithDaveUnderhill.
Ooh,„Dave.“SoundslikeLeonard'
sgotanewBFF.
Actually,he'
sprettycool.Imean,notonlyisheabrilliantscientist,butitturnsouthe'
sablack-diamondskier,hecollectsvintagemotorcycles,heplaysinarockband.
So?
We'
reinarockband.
No.Weplay„RockBand“onourXbox.
Nicemotivationalspeechfromourleadguitarist.
He'
sfunnytoo.HedoesthishystericalimpersonationofStephenHawkinghavingphonesex.Whatareyouwearing?
That'
snot...Hedoesitbetter.Anyway,hesaidhewasgonnatakemetothegymtomorrow,soI'
mgonnagopracticemysitups.
Wow.Humongousmancrush,dude.
Yeah.It'
sofficiallyabromance.
PENNY
Hey,Sheldon,areyouandLeonardputtingupaChristmastree?
No,becausewedon'
tcelebratetheancientpaganfestivalofSaturnalia.
Saturnalia?
Gatherround,kids.It'
stimeforSheldon'
sbelovedChristmasspecial.
Inthepre-Christianera,asthewintersolsticeapproachedandtheplantsdied,pagansbroughtevergreenboughsintotheirhomesasanactofsympatheticmagic,intendedtoguardthelifeessencesoftheplantsuntilspring.ThiscustomwaslaterappropriatedbyNorthernEuropeansandeventuallyitbecomestheso-calledChristmastree.
Andthat,CharlieBrown,iswhatboredomisallabout.
Okay,well,thankyouforthat.ButIgotyouandLeonardafewsillyneighborgifts,soI'
lljustputthemundermytree.
Wait.Youboughtmeapresent?
Uh-huh.
Whywouldyoudosuchathing?
tknow.'
Causeit'
sChristmas?
Oh,Penny.Iknowyouthinkyou'
rebeinggenerous,butthefoundationofgift-givingisreciprocity.Youhaven'
tgivenmeagift.You'
vegivenmeanobligation.
Don'
tfeelbad,Penny.It'
saclassicrookiemistake.MyfirstHanukkahwithSheldon,heyelledatmeforeightnights.
Now,hey,it'
sokay.Youdon'
thavetogetmeanythinginreturn.
OfcourseIdo.TheessenceofthecustomisthatInowhavetogooutandpurchaseforyouagiftofcommensuratevalueandrepresentingthesameperceivedleveloffriendshipasthatrepresentedbythegiftyou'
vegivenme.It'
snowondersuicideratesskyrocketthistimeofyear.
Okay,youknowwhat,forgetit,I'
mnotgivingyouapresent.
No,it'
stoolate.Iseeit.Thatelfstickersays„ToSheldon.“Thediehasbeencast.Themovingfingerhaswrit.HannibalhascrossedtheAlps.
Iknow.It'
sfunnywhenit'
snothappeningtous.
Sheldon,Iamvery,verysorry.
No,no.Ibroughtthisonmyselfbybeingsuchanendearingandimportantpartofyourlife.I'
mgoingtoneedaridetothemall.
shappeningtous.
Ow.Ow.
Areyougonnamakeit?
Yeah,Iguess.Thanksforlettingmetryoutyourmotorcycle.
Noproblem.
Ihadnoideaitwassoheavy.Thingjustfellrightoveronme,didn'
tit?
Heh.
Yeah.Luckyforyouitwasn'
tmoving.
Oh,hey,Leonard.Ooh,areyouokay?
Oh,yeah.It'
sjustalittlemotorcycleaccident.
Oh,myGod.Howfastwereyougoing?
tknow.It'
sallsuchablur.
Goodone.Hecouldn'
tevengetitstarted.Hi.Dave.
Hi.Penny.Soit'
syourmotorcycle?
Oh.Isitokay?
sfine.
Luckyforthebikeitlandedonmyleg.
YoumindgivingmeahandwithSpeedRacerhere?
Oh,yeah.Yeah,sure.So,um,Dave,howdoyouknowLeonard?
maphysicist.
Ha,ha.No,you'
renot.
Whyisthatsosurprising?
Uh,well,it'
sjustthatthephysicistsIknowareindoorsyandpale.
mnotindoorsy.IjustweartheappropriatesunblockbecauseIdon'
ttakemelanomalightly.
SoareyouandLeonardworkingonanexperimenttogether?
Yeah,actuallyweare.
Yeah,we'
reexaminingtheradiationlevelsofphotomultipliertubesforanewdarkmatterdetector.
Uh,sweetie,sweetie,Davewastalking.Youknow,Ilovescience.
Sincewhen?
Sincealways.
Callmeageek,butIamjustnutsforthewholesubatomic-particlething.
ThelastthingIwouldevercallyouisageek.
Oh,well,that'
swhatIam.Queenofthenerds.
Hey,ifyou'
dlike,Icouldshowyouthelabwe'
reworkingin.We'
vegotsomecooltoys,youknow.Lasersandstuff.
Youknow,Ihavealwayswantedtoseeabigsciencelab.
Leonard,areyouokayhere?
Uh.Yeah,Iguess.
How'
boutwegoseeitnow?
Maybeafterwardswetakethebikeupthecoast.Wegrabalittlebitetoeat?
Um,yeah.Yeah,thatsoundsgreat.Letmejustgetmyjacket.
Boy,she'
lldo,huh?
Yeah,ifyoulikethattype.
Soyouandher...?
No,justneighbors.
Really.
tknowhowyoulivenextdoortothatwithoutdoingsomethingaboutit.
Actually...scienceismylady.
Okay.Let'
sgo.
Allright.Seeyoutomorrow,Leonard.
Seeya.Bye,Penny.Havefun.
Yes?
Didyouforgetyourkey?
tseeanythinginhereawomanwouldwant.
You'
rekidding.You'
vegotlotionsandbathoilsandsoaps.That'
stheestrogenhattrick.
Whatitisisacacophonousassaultofeucalyptus,bayberry,cinnamonandvanilla.It'
sasifmyheadweretrappedinthepajamasofasultan.
Sheldon,ifyoudon'
tlikethisstuff,let'
sjustgonextdoorandbuildherabear.
Itoldyoubefor
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